Blahgorrhea

I found out two nights ago that the smallest size at Starbucks is in fact not the tall, but that it is still the short. In an effort to pump more caffeine into Americans, they took the short off the menu, made the tall the smallest available menu size and added an enormous 20 ounce venti as the large. Considering how annoying the whole changing of sizes from small/medium/large (Domino’s is another terrible perpetrator of this pattern), I was very pleased to learn that I could still get a normal size cup of coffee. All this has happened since having become a huge Peet’s fan when there was a Peet’s store across from work. Now there is no Peet’s, and the local coffee shop has bad coffee, so I go to Starbucks. I had become used to the 10 ounce small that Peet’s has and was thrown off by the extra two ounces I receive in a Starbucks tall. Ordering a short gets me back into normal coffee drink size range, but it is only eight ounces. Now that is a 10-cent (and two ounce) dilemma.

I am just like Larry Ellison. Well, to be more precise, I’m just as bad as Larry Ellison. Last Friday I stopped at Farley’s to get a cup of coffee before coming into work. Even though there were parking spots open on the opposite side of the street, I decided just to double park in the direction I was headed. I had done this many times before and thought that I would be fine for the few minutes it takes to get coffee: my hazard lights were on after all. Low and behold, as I walked out with my delicious cup of coffee, a police officer was writing a ticket. I verified that he was ticketing my car and accepted the ticket graciously when he handed it over, despite his pompous attitude. [Continue reading…]

I was reading in a local coffee shop yesterday when a woman barged in and announced, “I’ve found money. I need the largest house coffee you have. And I need a lot of room for milk and suger.” I wanted to slap her right there. She clearly hadn’t been taught manners as a child. She didn’t storm out in a hurry, so it’s not as if she needed to be curt to get in and out fast. And then, when she left, she took about 50 paper napkins. It’s too bad the barista was polite to her.